Friday, March 18, 2011


I always wondered what relatives are meant for… No, I know they are "the relatives"… but they are programmed in one specific way (that's what I wonder about) They have standard questions to ask as per the status of the victim. Here is my research report:
1. If A (from here on, A = victim) is in 10th standard:
a)    "When are your board exams starting from?"
b)    "What subjects are you taking in 11th?"
2. If A has appeared in the 10th board exams and is trying to relax for sometime after those grueling exams (the same questions are used when A has got over the 12th board exams):
a)    "When are your results coming",
b)    "Board results are out na, how much did you score?"
3. If A is in 12th standard:
a)    "What are your subjects?" (Point to be noted: they must have already asked this question when A was in 11th standard, but they tend to repeat it to get on to the next question)
b)    "What are you going to do for your graduation? B.Sc. or engineering (for Science section) / B.Com or CA preparation (for Commerce section) /B.A. (for Arts section)?"
c)    "Which college did you get into?"
4. If A is in 3rd/final year of graduation:
a)    "What are you going to do for PG? MBA??" (This time, section does not matter)
5. If A's placement session is about to start in PG course:
a)    "Which company did you get in (??!!)?"
6. If A's placement session is in progress:
a)    "Which company did you get in (??!!)?"
7. If A's placement session has ended:
a)    "Which company did you get in (??!!)?"
(They are more concerned for A to get placed than A's parents or probably A him/herself)
8. If A is in job (this question will be asked irrespective of A being in job before or after PG):
a)    "When are you getting married (wink)?"
b)    "Have you already found someone in office (wink)?"
9. If A has just got married:
a)    "When are you giving us the good news (wink)??"
10. If A has 1 kid and is celebrating his/her first birthday:
a)    "When are we getting the good news next time (?????)??"
Once A has got 2 kids, the relatives' standard question bank runs out of any more questions and they apparently lose any interest in A's life. Still, some relatives do find out random questions based on the personal level of (dis)liking for A.
PS: all my dear relatives please don't take this on dil pe…. That's how relatives are programmed by God… and no one should question HIM (I have already started using the standard question bank on those A's who have reached 3rd level of status and occasionally on those who are on 8th level of status)
PPS: here relatives mean- people generally over 40 years of age…
PPPS: I am not in any mood to work today and so lot of research ideas are wandering in my little mind

1 comment:

  1. That's is very true and told in a light manner..nice one :) - Arpit


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